We’ve all lived it and we’ve all seen it. A child doing something they shouldn’t be doing and the parent telling them to stop. The child either pretends not to hear (or shoots a look of defiance) before going back to what their parent told them not to do. What happens next?
Some parents will choose to ignore the defiant child and pretend they forget telling their child to stop. Other parents will count to ten, giving their child ten more chances to disobey. Some will use an emotional plea like, “It makes me sad when you don’t obey me.” Still others will use bribes, such as, “I’ll get you a toy at the store if you do what I asked you to do.” Some will use fear and use a loud voice. A small percentage of parents will actually stop what they’re doing to quietly confront the defiant child and correct them.
Whatever our approach to handling this situation is, we need to realize and understand that the disobedient child (in the act of disobedience) is in the most crucial moment of correcting. Do your children obey you? What is your daughter’s reaction to you when you tell her no? How does your son respond when you tell him to stop what he’s doing?
The saying “practice makes permanent” applies to parenting as much as anything else. When we practice and follow through with the gift of saying “No”, we’re setting our children up for success in their walks with God and in the world outside of our homes. How can we expect our children to take the big steps of obedience in their lives when we aren’t giving them chances to practice small steps of obeying when we tell them “No” or “Stop”?
When we expect our children to obey us quickly, completely and cheerfully, it can actually be for their safety. This recently played out in front of my eyes when I yelled “Will, stop!” as my excited son started running to meet up with his friends. He didn’t see the fast-moving truck coming down the road through the parked cars. He immediately stopped, dead sprint, and turned around to look at me. Not only is expecting our children to obey beneficial to their safety, it is essential to “raising them up in the way they should go”, essential to teaching them about how we are all under authority and essential to teaching them to be self-controlled. Most importantly, it is essential to teaching them to obey God and take Him at His Word.
Parents, this is your test. Will you rise to the challenge and consistently remind your child that they are under your authority? Or, will you repeatedly ignore the disobedient behavior and, day by day, hand all of your God-given authority over to your small child?
Under authority,
Posted in A Word from the Pastor