I recently taught at church about how to treat fellow believers when we disagree politically. Christians who differ on such issues should always do so with a spirit of kindness, graciousness, and understanding. Indeed, this spirit honors King Jesus.
I know a little bit about conflict. Like everyone else, I’ve had my fair share of personal skirmishes with my wife, kids, family, co-workers, teammates, etc. Additionally, for the past 33 years, I have been called in to help hundreds of other people resolve their broken relationships. In fact, just this past week, I had the opportunity to help resolve a dispute between two dear friends. Fortunately, humility carried the day, and all was well.
I meet people all the time who are looking for something better. I often cringe when a new visitor at our church will “go off” about another church they’ve visited. For instance, they complain about the pastor having green teeth (or something like that). If the opportunity presents itself (and I often try to make it present itself), I recommend they talk to that pastor about the green teeth situation. They certainly need to work it out.
Let’s face it, looking down on others (and belittling them) is an easy trap to fall into. It’s like stepping in dog doo-doo without realizing it. Maybe it’s human nature to want to make ourselves look better by making others look bad. Admittedly, I catch myself doing it all the time. This behavior usually manifests itself into gossip. We think people should be all put together, like us — ha!
Oftentimes we can take the body of Christ for granted. With some, the busyness of life can cause them to miss opportunities to be together. For others, the fear of judgment, admonishment, or conviction can lead Christians to keep others at arm’s length. Honestly, I can get very distracted with ministry life. Because of this, I miss the true beauty and benefit of being in the same room with Believers; I don’t savor the fellowship we share and the Holy Spirit. But, we read in Psalm 133 that we experience a true blessing from God when we lovingly and humbly “do life” with one another.
Through many circumstances, I have recently experienced how much I need to be with others living for God’s Kingdom. Firsthand, I have seen Saints walk in obedience, “encouraging each other daily” (Hebrews 3:13). I have also witnessed discipleship in action as Believers have instructed those in the faith (Romans 15:14). What is more, while walking through family trials, God has allowed me to experience our “burdens being shared” (Galatians 6:2) and “others stepping into our weeping and rejoicing” (Romans 12:5).
His Good Plan for Believers
Being with other Believers is God’s intention for our Christian walk. Without a doubt, it supplies so much good for us. Being connected with God’s people offers protection and accountability in our struggles (James 5:16). Additionally, it gives us support when we are discouraged or in need (Galatians 6:2). Community always provides endless opportunities to “die to ourselves” by loving and serving our brothers and sisters (John 13:15). Indeed, that is our most remarkable testimony to a lost world that we are followers of Jesus. His truth definitely changes us (John 13:35). Possibly the most freeing thing of all is being connected to other Christians — it surely allows us to be who God made us to be. God has specifically given me my gifts, talents, and passions to be the perfect, complimenting piece to the rest of the body around me (1 Corinthians 12).
“Your commandment makes me wiser than my enemies, for it is ever with me. I have more understanding than all my teachers, for your testimonies are my meditation. I understand more than the aged, for I keep your precepts.” — Psalm 119:98-100
The clock radio alarm went off at 5:40 a.m.; I turned it off and got out of bed. My wife said, “What was the rest of that commercial? The one that was just on?” I said, “I didn’t hear.” (A statement to my auto-piloting when I get up.) She replied, “The commercial said, ‘If only there were an owner’s manual for relationships?’” However, since I turned it off, we will never know.
Last week, the pastors and deacons of The Rock Church got away together. We went to Eden to spend some uninterrupted time together. For three days, we ate, sang, laughed, and prayed. We shared what the Lord was doing in our lives. There was even time for some brothers to golf and hike together. (It may not surprise you that I stayed back at the house to spend the afternoon with a cat who lived nearby.)
There is one thing I know. At some point, you will definitely offend or sin against someone close to you. Simply stated, between family, friends, co-workers, (or just doing life with people) conflict happens.
The good news is that the time between the offense and the resolution is within our control. Dealing with it quickly creates peace in our hearts. On the other hand, if not dealt with, conflict causes war in our hearts. Jesus gives us some clear steps on how to resolve conflict.
